A week ago I received a phone call from a children’s modeling agency stating that they were interested in my two year old son. They invited us to a casting call and while my son was completely unaware as to what we were going to do, I was nervous. I didn’t know how these things went but I was very interested in seeing the process.
When I arrived it seemed like chaos. I understood that it was organized chaos. More than anything, I was happy that I was on the other end of the spectrum. (Just like I’m very happy to be the mom who drops her child at daycare and not the daycare teacher…Whoo!) After 15 minutes or so a familiar face and her beautiful bundle of joy walked into the waiting area. This beautiful black queen of a mom possessed the most beautiful chocolate skin and a smile that captivated the room. I immediately knew where I’ve seen her before. I noticed her from a gym I used to train at in Chicago’s South Loop. Her daughter had piercing blue/green/brown eyes. She had fair skin and golden hair. Looking at her mom, ignoring all of the obvious differences, I thought about how much she looked like her. However, rest of the moms (80% white) looked as if they saw a ghost.
I could tell that they were shocked that this black queen birthed this little girl with bright eyes and fair skin. I chuckled wondering will people realize that this melanin that drips like gold produces all shades and colors? When will colorism not matter? When a blonde woman gives birth to a red headed child she doesn’t wonder if she will have onlookers wondering how. People just assume that the child’s father, grandmother, or great grandfather has red hair. No one wonders if that baby belongs to the mother. And ultimately, no one cares.
Believe me, I fully acknowledge that white mothers who give birth to brown babies get the same treatment and it’s just as appalling. Resembling your children doesn’t make you a good mom nor does it make you more of a mom.
Disappointing for me, but not him, Cayden was completely shy and wasn’t deemed ready for agency. They advised that I bring him back in three months but I think we should wait until he actually turns three. He still received the treats he was promised for doing an amazing job because anytime you take a chance/risk you are doing an amazing job.
I exchanged information with the mom of the adorable little girl and maybe we will keep in touch. For now, I just smile at how gracefully she handled the stares. How she smiled, sat with poise, and spoke with class. Glad to know her daughter has a mom that will be able to teach her manners. Because clearly some people didn’t have moms that taught them to keep their eyes to themselves.
Until next time…