The reason I make my son face himself


Accountability is everything. However, it seems as though we live in a world where NO ONE is responsible for anything they do unless it brings extreme success. Then, they call themselves “self made”. But when they make decisions that change the course of their lives or those around them negatively…it’s not their fault. Seems legit right?

Rarely do we take a moment to think about the part we play prior to consequences being handed down. Not in my house. There are no passes because you are two. At two, my son’s comprehension seems to be at the level of most children who are five. However, even if it wasn’t he is still held accountable for the decisions he makes. If I give a fair warning (or several it seems) that a particular act will result in a certain reaction on my end then you just have to deal.

It amazes me that so few adults are able to sit and marinate, solely, on their role in something. The failure of relationships, careers, families, and so much more has everything to do with an outside entity and nothing to do with what we could have done differently. Someone once said that a mistake executed more than once is no longer a mistake…but a decision. Truth! Because of this I want my son to choose to grow and evolve in a way that’s productive and admirable. He can’t do this unless he faces himself. To every action is a reaction.

At two, it’s simple and complex at the same time. “If you don’t clean up your toys you won’t get to blah blah blah” Simple enough right? Still he will refuse. Until he sees that this thing he wanted so badly is now taken away. If he wins it back by completing the task at hand he has to have a conversation with me about why it was so difficult to do what was right from the beginning. However, the complexity enters because at two he needs to understand that there aren’t always second chances. There aren’t always “do overs”. Most¬†importantly, sometimes we lose very important things and people because of our decisions. As long as he is able to confront the man in the mirror he can create a life that he and I will both be very proud of.

“You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself in any direction you choose. You’re on your own, and you know what you know. And you are the guy who’ll decide where to go.”~ Dr. Seuss

Until next time!

photo credit: Jestin Xavier

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