With any journey in life there is fear of the unknown, assumptions, wishes, and truth that slaps us in the face like a bag of bricks. Parenting is no different. We wonder what it will be like, we fear all of the rumors we’ve heard, and we get slapped in the face hard. Only it’s usually with apple sauce, vomit, or a stream of pee (I’m a boy mom smh). Anyhow, I thought it would be cool to give you 10 things I’ve learned since changing my name to Mommy.
- You’re not supposed to poop alone. I mean how stupid was I to believe that going to the bathroom was actually a private act. I mean, to be honest, nothing is the bathroom seems to be private anymore.
- You will clean up 10x a day…everyday…and you house will still not be clean. Like seriously, I spic and span my living room only to discover my child has taken out every single toy in his room and is blowing bubbles in my kitchen.
- When children are sleepy you nearly despise them. Going to bed would seem like the smart thing to do. But nooooooo! Instead of napping they scream in Wal-Mart, throw toys across the room, and slob uncontrollably only to fall asleep somewhere like next to the toilet.
- You will get so tired that you break all the rules. Candy for breakfast? Sure, just get out of my face kid.
- You will touch nasty stuff nearly every day. You will make them spit things back in your hand, dig in their mouths, touch poop, and so much more. God my stomach hurts thinking about it. Enough of that.
- You will cry for no reason. None. You will feel crazy crying for no reason but you will feel so much better afterwards (moms are weirdos).
- You will become a saving guru. Remember that ketchup that you used to just throw in the cart at the grocery store? Not anymore! “So they want $2.99 for some Hunt’s? Not today Satan! We will get our ketchup from Wal-Mart.”
- Holiday’s will officially make you feel like you’re a kid again. You will toy shop, wake up early to see the excitement in their faces, and feel more proud of traditions (whether you created them or not).
- You will watch them sleep no matter how old they are. They’re beautiful.
- The same little person that irritates you will make you the happiest person alive.
Our children change us. We cannot grow without change. How awesome is that?!